i'm in here somewhere

I am overweight. That period at the end of that sentence was literal.

I bought a new scale the 25th of July and I got off before the numbers came to a stop. I saw them go higher than they ever have before and I actually stepped off before the dial could show me the final number. The next morning I got on and I stayed put. I was crushed by what I saw, I have to be that honest... But it wasn't as devestating as I thought it would be. I guess deep down I really did know what was coming.

As humiliating as this is to publish to the world (even though I know not that many people check my blog), I just feel, scratch that, I  KNOW that I need to be held accountable in this journey that I am taking!

As you know, I am now single...but more importantly I am a single PARENT. I need to be here for Nell...both long-term and NOW! She needs me now...she needs a mom with enough energy to keep up with her and not one that gets wiped out just from a day at work. So I am doing this in part for Nell...but mostly I am doing it for ME! The temple of my body has been neglected and I am no longer putting myself second to anyone or anything. I can't do anybody any good (including myself!) if I'm not doing my BODY good!

So here's a break down of what I'm up to...

Strategy: I am readying Joshi again, as you might remember from my last (pre-pregnancy) detox plan.  His diet* worked this body OVER last time and I know that this program works for me. 
*Diet: I don't say diet as in plan to lose weight...although thats ultimately what I want to do. I say diet here as in what I will be (and will NOT!) be eating.

The plan: I am doing a weekly weigh in and am sharing it with friends and family that are on     Team-Marit!

Exercise: Right now I am walking...between 1 and 2 hours in the evening, on the days I don't have Nell.  I have two training videos that I am going to experiment with on the evenings that I have Nell and I hope that they'll be a good fit for me on the nights I can't get out.  My exercise goals are to cross country ski as much as possible this winter (already have a couple of training partners lined up!) and to be biking by next summer...after I dig up a bike somewhere!!!

Important Dates: I started the 25th of July...the date that I bought my new scale. I have set my first goal to be reached by the 31st of December 2011!!! I will start the year of 2012 at a weight that I have not been since as long as I can remember...and I can't wait.

All of this will be hard for me. But I need to do it. I need to be held accountable and more importantly I want to be accountable! I need to do this. No more postponing. There is no time like the present. In the decisions that I made for my new life, post divorce, I have promised myself that I was no longer going to sugar coat things. I was no longer going to make excuses for anyone and I was going to be brutally honest if necessary. And there is no more important thing to be brutally honest about than my health.

So here we go! I am looking forward to breaking out of this shell and finding Marit's true identity again...I know she's in there...and she's ready to SHINE!